“A man's reputation is what other
people think of him; his character
is what he really is.”
(I found this quote on ThinkExist.com
Not sure who to attribute, but if
you know that there should be someone,
please let me know)
So much is made out of one's reputation. People say how
important it is to have a "good" reputation. However,
I think sometimes there is a problem with people confusing
another's reputation for who the person is.
Have you ever noticed that someone with a good reputation
may not be all that they're supposed to be? Or have you
ever gone with someone whose reputation was questionable
with good result?
Might it be possible to create a "good" reputation as a
means to manipulate or influence someone into doing
something? As I write this question, Bernie Madoff
comes to mind.
Anyone can say anything about anybody or anything. If
enough people say it, it is in writing, and in enough
places, it could even become "gospel." It is what
advertising builds itself upon.
When you hypnotize someone, the less likely they are to
be a certain way, the more you have to hit them over the
head with suggestions to try to get them to be another way
(at least if you are an ineffective hypnotist or a hypnotist
who doesn't know what they're doing).
It's kinda like how advertising works. You want someone
to do something they've never done before, so what do you
do? You shower them with it over and over. You beat them
into doing things differently. There are statistics that
will tell you how much you have to "go at" a person before
they submit (or in a nicer way, how many times a person
needs to be exposed to your product or service before
they'll be interested in buying from you).
A lot of what advertising does is sneaky. Collective *gasp,*
I know. What a surprise. However, the reason it works is
because we aren't conscious of the ability we have to screen
things out, and make choices instead of acting upon a
Everyone has a "gut" feeling about things. Some more than
others, and some more frequently than others. The difference
I would contend is a combination of practice and trust. Those
who have the best relationship with their gut are the ones
who have learned to pay attention to the feeling, and better
yet, have learned to act appropriately on what that feeling is
I would suggest that the advertising and marketing businesses
would go out of business if - as a rule - we used our gut. We
wouldn't need benefits explained to us. We wouldn't need to
be educated on why we so desperately needed this thing someone
was trying to get us to buy. We wouldn't have to be exposed
to so much in your face advertising. If we were in touch with
our gut, we could check in - on anything - and make a decision
based on whether or not this thing was worth our investment.
Just recently someone bought one of my "love letters," but knew
nothing of why I was doing what I did, and hadn't read the page
I designed. So many people in marketing will say do it a
different way, and I'll get better results. However, I could
have said anything on that page, and still have made a "sale"
to that person (from what it sounds like).
Some people will even justify the manipulation, as it is in the
best interest of the person - for "their own good." I am not
sure how I feel about that, as manipulation is manipulation,
and how many people do you know who want to be manipulated?
Sy Syms says "An educated consumer is our best customer."
I love that statement, and the belief that stands behind it.
I want someone to come to me because they know it is
something they want and need, not because I have
convinced them of that fact. If you know what you are
doing, and choose it, our dynamic will be so much
better, and you'll get so much more out of it, than
if you are doing it blindly or are unconsciously driven
by my sales pitch.
Your intuition is IMMEDIATE. It doesn't need to figure anything
out. It doesn't need to be convinced, or sold to. When I speak
with anyone about whether or not they should work with me my
suggestion always is for them to check in with their gut, and
let me know what they want to do. I feel that it is just as
important for me as for them. If it's not the right thing for
someone, how could it possibly be right for me? I don't know
about you, but I have had some pretty awkward situations, at
best, when it's not "right."
Sometimes we may be blocked from our gut by things that are
happening, or have our attention. However, it doesn't mean that
it's not there to access. The sun, after all, is still there
on a cloudy day. (As a side note this is the type of thing we'll
be addressing on my World of Perspective Radio show
on June 25th with Janet Thornburg: Being in Touch with
Your Best Self)
In closing, just like products have reputations
through their advertising, and just like people
will have their reputations, it doesn't mean
that one, they are who and what they say they
are and two, even if they are exactly as
advertised or promoted, it may not mean that
they are what is best for YOU. And, that, my dear
reader, ONLY YOU will know.